How to Effectively Co-Parent During the Holidays

How to Effectively Co-Parent During the Holidays

Posted By R. Gregory Colvin LLC || 12-Sep-2018

If you were recently divorced and share children with your ex-spouse, you might be dreading the holidays. After all, this time of year is often stressful enough for families who have not endured the trauma of divorce. However, there are ways to go about co-parenting effectively, so that you, your ex-spouse, and your children are able to enjoy the holidays with little to no incident. Remember, there is no such thing as a perfect family, so focus on making this season magical rather than on the things you wish you could change.

Below is a list of some tips that will help you effectively co-parent throughout the holiday season:

  • Never make your children choose which parent they would prefer to spend the holidays with: If you leave it up to your children to decide where they would rather spend the holidays, you are putting them in an unfair and cruel position since they will inevitably feel bad about having to choose between you and their other parent. When they do answer, you might not even get the response you are fishing for, which will also make you unhappy. Instead of consulting the kids about their preferences, create a plan with your co-parent or refer to your visitation schedule.
  • Check with your co-parent before making plans: If you and your ex-spouse do not already have a plan that outlines who gets to spend time with the children for each holiday, now is the time to sit down and have a talk. Coming up with a plan that reasonably addresses the needs of both parents and the children is critical, so do this immediately if you have yet to put one in place. It will help relieve some of the stress from this holiday season and for many more to come.
  • Compromise: You might have your heart set on some very specific plans for the holidays, but that does not mean you will get everything you want. If you planned on taking a week off from work to go on vacation with the kids during Christmas, but your ex-spouse wanted to spend Christmas Eve with them, you are going to need to hash out a compromise. This might mean asking if your ex-spouse would like to spend Thanksgiving and the New Year with the kids in exchange for allowing you to spend Christmas Eve and Christmas Day with them.
  • Learn to start new traditions: You and your children might have some very fond memories of past holidays spent together as a family and, while a divorce certainly changes things, it does not mean the holiday fun is over. There are probably some traditions you will be able to keep and share with them, but chances are you are also going to have to create some new ones. Try to get creative and come up with some new traditions that will have just as much meaning for you as previous traditions did.
  • Make time to relax: The holidays are stressful for many of us, regardless if you recently went through a divorce or not. With so many events going on, your stress levels are likely through the roof and life might feel incredibly overwhelming. To avoid ultimately snapping out of frustration, take a moment for yourself to relax and enjoy some peace and quiet. Do something you enjoy or simply stay home and get some rest. Whatever you need to do to feel relaxed, set aside some time to do it.
  • Use your support system: Unfortunately, you are going to spend one or more of the holidays on your own, without your children and you might feel lonely. In fact, it might be downright difficult to cope with. This is not the time to dwell on your grief and how hard it is to be without them. You need to reach out to your support system, whether it be close friends or family members, instead of focusing on how miserable it is to be without your kids. Let those who love you help distract you from some of the difficulties you might face and you will ultimately be able to get through this.

Divorce Attorney in Orlando

If you and your spouse are getting a divorce, now is the time to retain the skilled legal counsel you need to assist you throughout this complex and emotional process. At R. Gregory Colvin, LLC, our divorce attorney in Orlando is dedicated to helping clients navigate any family law matter. We understand the difficulties associated with such delicate issues and will ensure your interests are protected.

Start working on your case today and contact our team at (407) 603-3460 to request a free confidential case evaluation with our knowledgeable and compassionate attorney.

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